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Movie Review: Valerian and the City of a Thousand Planets

July 27, 2017

valerian_final_alt3_1sht_27x39_smallThe latest film from Luc Besson is overflowing with thousands of amazing ideas, but it has no clue what to do with all of the ideas at play here. I mean there are seriously several films worth of ideas on screen at any given time, but they flew past as quickly as they came with little to no impact on the main plot.

Speaking of the main plot, it was a mess, and it’s told in the most confusing way possible. Dialogue was also shit for the most part, cringe worthy really. Especially when the only conversations our main characters have with each other is about their possible relationship.

Acting was rough all around, but I really need to call out Dane Dehaan as the stiffest and least convincing of the whole bunch. Cara Delevingne still isn’t the best actress, but I can at least say that she’s getting better and better with each new role I see her in.

Special effects were amazing, beautiful even at parts. But maybe that’s kinda part of the problem too? I really feel like Luc Besson just wanted an excuse to film a bunch of these cool cgi action sequences, and didn’t care at all about the connective tissue. Giving him such a ridiculous budget to blow through didn’t help things either.

Overall I can’t recommend going out and paying full ticket for this, but once it hits streaming I think it’ll be a great movie to watch while smoking and drinking with friends. So bad it’s good is a phrase that comes to mind. 5.5/10

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